One Decision that Changed My Life Course

Would you travel 8, 500 miles to marry someone you never met in person?

Four years ago, I was a sad excuse for a human being. I was fighting a whole bunch of mental problems and losing badly. I was fat, and only felt the need to leave my house to eat at McDonalds or get a pizza. I was getting heavier every day and my health was suffering. I didn’t take care of my hygiene until it got to the point where I couldn’t stand myself anymore. I spent my days sleeping with small breaks to surf the internet or play a quick game of Left 4 Dead on my Xbox. I didn’t have a job and couldn’t keep one if I tried.

The worst thing was: I was lonely.

You can imagine, in the shape I was in, that I wasn’t very popular with the ladies. The last time I had any contact with a woman was seven years before, back when I still had a wife that wasn’t cheating on me.

I tried a few dating sites, but my profile was so laughable that no one ever replied to me.

One day, I was surfing the net and I came across a website called Cherry Blossoms. It was basically a site for women from the Philippines to meet foreign men and marry them.

I didn’t think I was ready to get married again, but after reading about a few of the women on the site, I decided to create a profile and see what would happen. There were literally hundreds of women on this site who didn’t care what you looked like or your age, they just were interested in meeting men who were not Filipino.

Right away I got many, many replies to my profile. Despite everything that was wrong with me, these women were reaching out to me. I was totally surprised to say the least because I had been brutally honest about myself and they didn’t care.

I exchanged email with a few of the ladies, but didn’t really click with any of them. It wasn’t till a few days later that I met F that I finally found someone I was interested in.

Most people would say it was not possible, but I fell in love with her from her pictures, before I even met her. She had this smile that even pierced the darkness I was living in. She was so beautiful that I didn’t think she would be interested in me, but I sent her a “smile” anyway and hoped for the best.

She contacted me back the same day, and we made arrangements to chat that night. It had been so long since I had a conversation with a woman that I hoped I didn’t freeze up and not be able to say anything.

That night we video chatted for hours. At first I didn’t say much and I don’t think I smiled that much either, but she kept the conversation going until I finally warmed up. We talked about everything and I made an effort to be very honest about myself. She didn’t seem to care that I was 18 years older than she, or that I was a foot taller and outweighed her by a couple hundred pounds. She didn’t care that I didn’t have a job and that I was living off Social Security.

After that night, we made arrangements to talk the next day, but because of the time difference, we didn’t end up talking for a few days. The funny thing was, she thought it was because I wasn’t interested in her. After we reconnected again, we talked every day after that.

Things went very quickly from there. Within a month I told her I loved her and a few weeks later, I asked her to marry me. She happily said yes and I started to make arrangements to go to the Philippines.

The funny thing was, just from talking to her, I was changing. I was eating a better diet to lose a little weight. I left the house more often. I took a shower every day. I was trying to better myself, when I never felt the need to change before.

She made me want to be a better man.

A few months later, I got rid of everything I owned except for what would fit in two suitcases, said goodbye to my family, and left for the Philippines to get married.

It sounds crazy, but it was the best decision I ever made.


This post was a response to the WordPress Daily Prompt: Let’s go Crazy, where we were asked to write about:

Sometimes, we act on impulse: it could be something as small as ordering that special dessert on the menu, maybe asking out that cute boy or girl, or as large quitting your job and selling everything you own to become a shepherd in New Zealand. What’s the most crazy, outrageously impulsive thing you’ve ever done? If you’ve never succumbed to temptation, dream a little. If you gave yourself permission to go a little crazy, what would you do?



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